Final Letter from Mom
I wrote this letter and sent it to you when I sent the last package through the local people here in Utah. I wanted to have something for you to tuck into your bag and be able to read as you traveled across the world. You have over 7000 miles that you will cross! Today, you began that very travel. I wonder if you will read this right away or if you will save it for a layover? I wonder if you will be able to feel the love I have for you as you read it. I wonder if you have any idea how much I have truly missed you and just how incredibly proud of you I am. I love that you finally get to open my envelope and I selfishly cannot wait to see you soon but my heart mourns for you as you say goodbye to Brazil and to your mission. I don't know what it is like to be a missionary and to work like you have worked but I know what my heart felt as you flew to Boston and then to Brazil. I know the sadness and the ache that exists as you say goodbye to those you love so very much.
I am looking forward to seeing your face and to be able to FINALLY give you a hug! See you soon. Travel safe. I love you for forever and for always.
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July 2022
Sister Garcia,
You’ve done it! You’ve made it! Congratulations to you are in order on this very special day as you board a plane and make your way home. I wish I knew just where to start in order to try my best to express my gratitude and appreciation to you for your willingness to selflessly put your life on hold and take the last 18 months to serve our Heavenly Father. The example you have set from the moment you made a choice to start your papers is one that set a domino effect in action and has continued to impact myself and so many around you.
I can remember the morning of September 15th like it was yesterday. I wondered as you left to go to work if that would be the day that you would receive the infamous text saying that your mission call had arrived and that you would have a chance to view it. I remember you being a little ‘off’ that morning but you had a smile on your face and you headed out the door. I remember getting on the treadmill and as I turned on the tv, my heart just knew that this would be the day. This would be the day that would change your life. I remember sending Brittan a text at like 9:30am and asking what time of day he received his call. Do you know what his reply was to me? “Right now”. My reply was simply “I knew it would be here when I woke up this morning”. And then I got a text from Tyler saying “It’s here”. I tried to stay on my treadmill but the tears in my eyes took over. And then I heard you coming down the stairs so I composed myself the best I could and waited. You came around the corner so full of happy! You were beaming and you were literally bouncing in your shoes. I will never forget that smile or that simple moment seeing you as you shared with me that your call had come in and that you were going to go to the temple.
When you got back from the temple and shared with Tyler and me where you had been called, there wasn’t a freak out moment for me at all. I was so at peace with Brazil. I didn’t have any reason to have reservations because I didn’t know anything at all about it! But you were just beaming. The entire time you talked with us. And then you and Tyler went into the office and started the Google search on the area and we saw the super cool buildings and read about your Mission President and his wife. You were entranced and excited. You were already mentally preparing yourself to be a missionary in that very moment.
Catching moments of you throughout each day from this point on included talking about Brazil and hearing you on Duolingo learning Portuguese. Your flashcard pile began to grow at a crazy rate and I often wondered if you would even need to go to the MTC at all. You were dedicated from the moment you read your call. I remember the first time Tyler asked you to say family prayer and encouraged you to say as much as you could in Portuguese. You were hesitant at first but as you started and as the words came out of your mouth I could feel the comfortability of this language for you. I had no clue what you were saying but I knew you did and I could feel the strength of your faith and testimony as you said the prayer that evening. As nights would pass by and you continued to offer those prayers the language was clearly becoming second nature for you. This was such a powerful testament of who you are and the missionary you knew you were capable of being.
The night you were set apart as a full-time missionary I thought my heart was going to explode. In both good and bad ways to be honest. I wasn’t sure how I was going to get through 6 short weeks of home MTC knowing I was going to have to put you on an airplane. That was going to crush my heart for sure. But on the flip side I could not wait for you to be able to share all you had been studying and learning with those in the MTC with you, your instructors, and even to your Heavenly Father. Double edged sword this whole Mission Mom gig. And true to who you are and all you had been doing, your time spent in the home MTC was time well spent. You made new friends, you thrived off of the learning, your instructors were astounded at the language skills you possessed already, and you were growing day by day into this amazing human who was more than ready to go out and take on the world as a missionary! It was so fun to watch you and your happiness in this time.
Then the day that you got a message saying you would be reassigned to serve in the Massachusetts Boston Mission came. Oh, you were so upset and so disappointed but ‘not really’ were your words. I could see it in your eyes that this wasn’t in your plan. You were preparing yourself to be in Brazil from the very get go. Dang Covid had to come in and mess up that plan pretty good right? But you continued to push forward and worked hard. You started to learn a little about the Mission President and his wife there and you began to look forward to this new twist in the plan. You were gaining excitement I guess if you will.
We got your shopping done, both for Boston and Brazil. I still find myself laughing when I think about the cart at the Target full of deodorant and tampons. So freaking funny. And then to know that they were going to start in Boston is even funnier for some reason. How many of those do you think you have left? Did we at least guess right when we did the buying? I was trying to cover my emotions a lot during these last few weeks with you at home knowing that regardless of what I was trying to do, the day would come that you would fly.
The night before you were scheduled to fly to Boston was hard. Holy cow so hard. But you were so excited, or at least that was what you were showing to us. I can still see you and Tyler working to get things in suitcases, I can still see Brooklyn at the top of the stairs watching with tear filled eyes, I can still remember the sound of the zipper as you closed it up for the night, and I can remember the sound of Jason Miller knocking on the door so he and Tyler could give you a blessing before you flew. I wasn’t ready dang it! I wasn’t sure I was going to really be okay with you leaving. The blessing you received that evening was so touching and so peaceful. I remember bawling through the whole thing and just counting my blessings that we have been blessed with great friends in the Millers and also for you and the choice you had made at that very moment to go out and do. The feeling in our home that evening was humbling to say the least. Do you remember when Akaela gave you a hug before her and Jason left? I think it is the only time I have ever seen her cry. Seriously. And add that to the already ache going on inside of my heart, it was pure torture. But I was so excited for you! I remember as you headed downstairs to your room for the night. I wanted so badly to follow you and stay with you all night and talk and get in as much time with you that I could but I also knew that 3am was going to come super quick so I climbed into bed myself.
I don’t believe I even slept at all. I was awake when my alarm went off and I knew that I needed to put on a good happy front so as not to add to any distress and sadness that I knew both Christian and Brooklyn were feeling. I knew I needed to guard my heart some as well. What I didn’t know at the time was the hurt and sadness that even Tyler was feeling. Our morning was quiet in the house and not much was said. There were oodles of feelings and when it was time to load up in the car and head to the airport, I remember taking some quick photos and hoping that I could at least get to the airport before I let out a tear. It worked! Ha…but mostly because there wasn’t too much said on the way there. There was small chatter amongst us but very little compared to most days when we are all in the car together for sure. You took the airport no big deal…waited in line and then when I couldn’t stand it any longer, I joined you. I still laugh at the over weight charge we paid for your bags only because I knew they were packed for two very different missions! It was when the ticket agent took that last bag and handed you a boarding pass that I felt my heart go right to my throat. I needed to hold the tears back…I kept telling myself I could do it. The walk to the weird new thing in the middle of the airport was SHORT! That wasn’t enough time to send you on your way. But I didn’t have a choice. The nice gentleman offered a family photo (who then took your group photo later because his daughter was traveling with you) and then it was time for goodbyes. And tears. Holy cow so many tears! We both know the images from that morning so I am not even going to touch them. Instead, I will hold them close on my heart for forever. And then it was time for you to walk through security. I stood there holding my heart, allowing my tears to fall freely, and watched as you turned and then were gone. Tyler was thankfully right there to wrap his arms around me and let me cry a good cry before we turned around to grab the other two kids and head back to the car.
If you thought the ride to the airport was quiet, you should have joined us for the ride home! All you heard was the engine running and sniffles from noses that had been crying. Not one word was said. When we got home, we all walked into the house and still, no words. Christian went down to his room, Brooklyn went to hers, and Tyler headed into ours. I went into the office to check Covid test results and send them to the mission office and then climbed back into bed to see if maybe I could sleep for a couple of hours. Your first text message came in telling me you had landed and I passed on that the mission office confirmed receipt of your results and then that was it until you made it to Boston when I got a couple quick messages letting me know you were safe and then a few when you made it to the hotel. The phone call that night was one of my most favorite. I knew you were safe; I knew you were with people who loved you, and mostly I knew you were happy. That is all I truly have ever wanted in life for you…your happiness.
Boston was a crazy whirlwind of a time for you and I loved every minute of being along for the ride! I loved listening to your calls each week and learning what you were seeing, experiencing, all about your companions, and being able to listen and see as your testimony was growing. There were definite good times and bad times in Boston for sure but some of each of those have molded you into the coolest human being. I remember the high school reunion days when you would show up for transfers. The friends you made along the way. The way the language that you had worked so hard and studied so hard came into play. I remember all of the dear Sisters who embraced and loved you. I remember you talking about traditions that missionaries had when it came to certain dates on missions, restaurants that would be attended, etc. I longed for those days for you. I remember when you went to Salem and the heck no thoughts that I had going on inside of my head regularly for you! I have heard about that place and quite frankly didn’t love that you were there. I knew you would be safe and fine but I still hated it.
There was a lot of good growth in Boston and I will never forget the day I saw my phone ringing with a call from you. I was sitting visiting with Lisa VanRooyen at her house. We had just discussed you and how you are, how is Boston, etc. I had another heart to the throat moments because I totally knew why you were calling! Lisa was so great and was fine if I took the call. The sheer joy in your voice was so fun to hear and even Lisa could hear it while she sat in the chair next to me. I was seriously so happy for you that Brazil was within reach for you finally.
I watched religiously the Visa status page. I was on it so many times a day! Tyler thought I was nuts and would often give me crap that the more I watched it the longer it would take. Ha..proved him wrong right?! The morning it had a green check mark I think I about lost anything and everything I had eaten in the last 30 days. I was sick. Sick with the reality of you leaving. Not just home but now the country. And then it hit me that you were leaving the country and I wasn’t going to be able to be at the airport to say goodbye! How does this happen? How do I change that? What can I do? All the things went on in my head and we didn’t even have travel plans yet. So funny!
Your Covid test taking night still causes me some anxiety. Your cute Sister Soares so unsure of letting you go off to Brazil. I can still see in her eyes the concern she had. You had made her feel so loved and welcomed her with open arms. Just another life touched along the way. I remember the messages back and forth as you went from Boston to Atlanta. (By the way…you have NO idea how hard it was not to book a flight…) I remember hoping someone along the way would send a photo to me showing me your face. I remember you telling me you met up with a bunch of other missionaries and for whatever reason, that still brings me to tears. I love that all over the world, young kids are choosing to serve the Lord and do His work selflessly. And you are among them! I remember learning someone bought Subway for you before you took off to Brazil. I remember that you were so freaking excited.
And then I remember waiting for what felt like an eternity to hear that you had landed and that President and Sister Nordfelt had you in their care. That was a torture filled kind of day. Your email that you sent was the best thing EVER. And from there…you have been feet on the ground, in Brazil, 100% committed, and making a difference in so many lives that they will be countless.
You have been working now as a full-time missionary on behalf of our Savior for 18+ months. I add the plus because your work began the moment you read your call. You have never waivered Kaitlyn and I am so dang proud of you. I think often of the sweet families you have worked with, who have fed and loved you, who have celebrated you, and who you have allowed to be on your heart forever. I think of your companions and the lessons they have taught you along the way. I think of the habits you have formed, the attributes you have acquired, and the testimony and faith that radiate through you even just in words. I think of the videos on your drive and the sheer amount of laughter that has been had over the course of the last 18 months. I think about the vast amount of acai that has been eaten! Ha ha ha…that alone was worth the trip to Brazil right? I think about number of lessons given, number of area books you have gone through, number of friends you have made and touched along the way, and I think of your own growth and changes that have taken place and all I can do is grin a silly goofy grin.
As you head home today I wanted to be certain to let you know that your choice has impacted two people right off the bat. I do not think after learning what I have learned, that Brittan would have stayed on his mission if you were not on yours. He struggled hard and he was ready to come home. He wasn’t sure he could do the whole mission thing and there were lots of phone calls home during his first few months. I know 100% that he relied on your faith and your example in order to be able to stay where he is and to finish his own mission strong. Think of all the people your actions and your example have blessed because he chose to stay out as a missionary! Next up…your own little brother. Christian would 1000% not be on a mission, nor would he have chosen to even start papers, had you not already been serving. He has admitted this to me in recent days in fact. Yet here he is in Africa doing all he can to do his best to humble himself and serve those around him. He will be much better in the end for his time there and you will be able to count those that he has brought to the Gospel as part of your own domino effect as well. I think of Brooklyn and the lessons she has learned from you. I think of the relationship that you will have with her when you get home. She will never take for granted that you are here and available and just a phone call or text away. I think of her own tender testimony that is starting to maybe decide to show up and I know that your service as a missionary and your example will only help that piece of who she is to grow. Tyler and I have been blessed beyond measure for your dedication, hard work, and unwavering service day in and day out. I think of the friends and acquaintances that we have been able to meet and spend a little time with, even just on Mondays. I think of our own love of the Gospel and the way it has grown to appreciate and love all missionaries out there in this world. All of this is because of YOU and your one simple choice to start some paperwork some time ago.
Kaitlyn…wowza am I so dang proud of you and man alive I cannot get you in my arms soon enough! The day you flew to Boston felt like forever but today seems like an eternity. Travel safe. We have oodles of time to make up and things to do together. I long to see your smiling face and to be able to wrap my arms around you tight. I love you more than you will ever truly be able to understand. Thanks for allowing me on this journey of yours and for allowing me to witness first hand the work of the Lord through you. Thanks for your example, your prayers, your devotion, dedication, and for your faith in all things. You have made me a better person over these last 18 months and for that I will be eternally grateful.
I love you for forever and for always. To the moon and back,
Mom
**Now….hurry home already! 😊
